God, thank you.

God, please keep me clean and sober today. Please help me to let go of yesterdays transgressions.....mistakes, and move forward today. God thank you for the means today to pay some bills. Thank you God that I do not have to panic today over a shut off notice, that you have supplied me a new life that only goes dark today if I let it. Thank you for faith that I have because I have seen you show up so many times.

Recovery World: Facebook 9/3/11

Ditto. And God, thank you for my 3 grandchildren and the opportunity and ability to spend time with them today.

Love

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

New International Version (NIV)

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

Love - Big shoes to fill. Isn't this what most of us strive for? Our ultimate goal. I hear this verse quite often in marriage ceremonies. I want this for my marriage and for my relationships. To some extent it is there. Maybe not all at once though. For that to be, I would have to be perfect. Life is a journey and not a destination. As long as I am persevering, I am thriving. For isn't that what life is all about?

Gratitude

We got up before the break of dawn this morning to be at the hospital at 5:30 AM. Jessica got into surgery at 7:30 and out at 10:30. She did very good. I feel such gratitude and relief. I just cried. God is so good to us.

I did find out though that the the University of Michigan hospital is a city within itself. Also, very busy. I also found out that you do not want to go out to eat when it is the week that the students are moving back to the University of Michigan and they have their parents in town with them. Dinner took 3 hours from the wait to the end. But, I feel indebted to this entity so, Go Blue!

I feel eerily calm today. We are heading to Ann Arbor for Jess to check in for her post-op for her surgery. The post-op is today at 1:00 and the surgery is tomorrow at 7:15 am. She has a tumor on her pituitary gland. Thankfully, they say it is benign. I just pray this is the answer for all the pain and problems she has been having.

I believe I almost what-if'ed the situation in the beginning but I had to put a screeching halt to that. How unproductive that can be. Oh and the anxiety it can produce. I am so glad the surgery is now here. She has done well waiting for it. At least she has appeared to.

Isaiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

It Is As It Is

The secret I am finding is staying in the moment. I cannot change the past and I cannot project future outcome. I have right now. The past does not define me.

Thank God for today.

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.Ralph Waldo Emerson